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  • 23 hours ago
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jaclcfrost:

[checks a tag on ao3]

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  • 23 hours ago
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dangshezza:

sherolck:

ok apparently everyones awake

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  • 23 hours ago
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  • 23 hours ago
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zygoats:

im literally always looking at my reflection not because im conceited but because i just think it feels kind strange to have a physical form and im constantly trying to process who and what i am

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  • 23 hours ago
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  • 23 hours ago
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daeneryus:

shutupaubrey:

princesschloepea:

life tip whatever dumb ass name you get siri to call you is what your iphone automatically signs your emails as. i have been applying to jobs for 2 months as queef.

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#OH MY GOD OH GMY GOD OH MY GOD NO N ONO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOO #HOLY SHIT #I HAVE BEEN APPLYING TO JOBS AS ANAL DESTROYER

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  • 23 hours ago
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romangodfrey:

i-kan-do-zat-i-kan-do-zat:

SO I REMEMBERED SEEING A VIDEO ON HERE ABOUT GORDON RAMSAY SHOWING HOW TO PROPERLY COOK EGGS. I WANTED EGGS FOR DINNER, SO I LOOKED UP THE VIDEO AND MADE THEM.

I TWEETED GORDON ABOUT IT AND I GOT A RESPONSE

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NOT ONLY DID I GET A RESPONSE, BUT I GOT A COMPLIMENT. HOW MANY PEOPLE CAN SAY THAT? 

many years I’ve been looking for a way to properly measure someone’s level of success in life and I think I’ve found it

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  • 23 hours ago
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broccoliavenger:

meulins-choice-ass:

87daysbefore:

me: 

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you:

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Lemon is someone out  theres favorite.

thats the most uplifting thing ive read all day

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  • 23 hours ago
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  • 23 hours ago
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At the grocery store

  • Woman:*on cellphone* Why am I leaving you? Why am I--I'll tell you why.
  • Woman:Here's why. You don't respect me.
  • Woman:You called me a whore in front of my children.
  • Me:*says nothing, but has a face like O.O*
  • Woman:You don't respect me. And you know, there some white chick here in the store, she walking, she heard me say that and she make a face.
  • Woman:Because even she know you a piece of shit.
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  • 23 hours ago
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ollielephant:

somethingwittythiswaycomes:

therothwoman:

lizawithazed:

ten0uttaten:

toocooltobehipster:

Banned Grey Poupon ad is hilariously wrong [YouTube]

THIS IS THE GREATEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN

WHY WAS THIS BANNED THIS IS BRILLIANT

They saw their chance and they fuckin took it.

ohhhhh myyyyy goooodddd

tannest-frey-of-all

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  • 23 hours ago
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